Member-only story
New Features for Dating Apps
I’ve done some research and I’d like some new features on my dating apps.
If there is a picture of a straight cis man holding a gun, a baseball bat, or a knife, I would like the app to delete him ASAP or if that’s not possible, please make the app turn the gun/baseball bat/knife into a bouquet of flowers both in the picture and in real life.
It’s a bit wild even to me, but last night a professional basketball player tried to get me to come over to his hotel room. My friend Abacus couldn’t find him on the team roster (shady), but he was 6'9 and he did have a picture of himself from Getty images playing basketball, like on a real court with a referee, so it seemed kind of legit. When I demurred and asked about his full name because rape and safety kind of matter to me, he wondered if I really thought that he would throw away his million dollar career to murder me in a hotel room.
Doubtful yes, I replied. I too have a million dollar career, I texted and then unmatched, because he was hot, but I don’t know, THE DRAMA.
So algorithm and app makers, here’s my point. I get asked too often on the APPs to go to people’s hotel rooms. I’m not sure if this happens…
